🎧 If you’d prefer to listen to this story, CLICK HERE to tune into the full podcast episode.

It’s been almost six months since I last published a podcast episode.

And while a lot has happened in that time, what I really want to speak to today isn’t the surface-level “life updates.” It’s the deeper pattern I’ve finally decided to stop claiming as mine.

Because here’s the truth:

Every time fear creeps in… every time the ego gets loud… every time the unknown feels a little too big…

I’ve noticed a habit of stepping back.

Pausing.

Putting my dream business on the back burner.

And this time, I’m choosing something different.

Being Pulled Back to the Work (Again and Again)

There have been moments where I’ve told myself, “Maybe I’ll just walk away from this whole entrepreneurial thing.”

And yet… every single time, I feel the same pull return.

An insatiable urge.

A deep craving.

A soul-level knowing.

I am here to build an online coaching business.

Not because it’s easy.

Not because I’ve “figured it all out.”

But because it’s what my soul keeps calling me back to.

And if you’re here reading this, I imagine you know exactly what that feels like.

When the Lesson Keeps Repeating

I’m currently immersed in the Business by Design community again, and being back in this space has reminded me of something important:

If a lesson keeps repeating, it’s not because you didn’t do the work.

It’s because you’re being asked to go deeper.

And this has been one of my recurring lessons.

Every time I prepare to launch something…

Every time I step closer to being seen…

Something in my life conveniently pops up that feels “more important.”

Motherhood.

Work.

Responsibilities.

Life.

And while those things are important, I’ve been honest with myself enough to see where I’ve been giving my power away.

Because unless my daughter or a loved one is in an actual emergency, nothing truly needs to stop me from tending to the business I say I want to build.

Nervous System Truth (Even When You Know Better)

This is the work I teach.

And yes, I still find myself in it.

Our nervous systems are wired for survival.

Our egos crave familiarity.

The subconscious will always choose what feels safe over what feels expansive.

So when the vision stretches us beyond what we’ve known, the system pulls us back to old habits.

And for me, that looked like hiding.

Not asking for support.

Trying to do it all alone.

And that’s what really made the difference.

The Plot Twist: Becoming Fully Self-Employed (In a Way I Didn’t Expect)

In the midst of all this, something unexpected happened.

I went from being an employee at a cleaning company to becoming an independent contractor. And almost overnight, I realized…

I could do this better on my own.

Within two months, I replaced my income with my own clients.

I quit the company.

And I became 100% self-employed.

What’s wild is that at the beginning of 2025, I declared:

“This is the last year I’ll ever be an employee.”

I thought that would happen through coaching.

The universe had other plans.

And while I’m deeply grateful for this chapter (and genuinely enjoy the work), I also know this truth:

The shoes don’t fit.

It meets my immediate needs, yes.

But it doesn’t light my soul on fire.

And I refuse to build a life around something that doesn’t.

The Liminal Space (Where So Many of Us Are)

This is the space I’m in right now.

Not who I was.

Not fully who I’m becoming.

That messy, gooey middle.

Where the caterpillar has dissolved…

But the butterfly hasn’t emerged yet.

There’s grief here.

There’s excitement here.

There’s uncertainty and devotion.

And if you’re here too, I want you to know:

You’re not behind.

You’re not broken.

You’re becoming.

Why Community Changes Everything

One of the clearest messages that’s been coming through for me lately is this:

You don’t walk your dharma alone.

We need mentors who’ve walked the path ahead of us.

We need peers who hold the vision with us.

We need environments that regulate our nervous system and stretch our identity at the same time.

When we change our environment, we change our frequency.

And when our frequency shifts, everything begins to recalibrate.

This is what pulled me back to the podcast.

Back to my work.

Back to building a space for others walking this same path.

Choosing a New Pattern (In Real Time)

The pattern I’m done repeating is this:

Putting my business last.

Life will always life.

Moves will happen.

Transitions will arise.

And still, I’m choosing to tend to my dream first.

Not perfectly.

Not without fear.

But consistently.

Because even 1% aligned action compounds over time.

Just like a river carving the Grand Canyon…

Just like a plane adjusting its course by one degree…

Consistency creates entirely new destinations.

What’s Coming Next

I’m reopening a group coaching container focused on Spiritual Embodiment — supporting conscious entrepreneurs in cultivating clarity, consistency, and confidence so they can follow through on their soul’s calling.

More details are coming soon.

For now, this is me choosing to show up.

Messy.

Honest.

Devoted.

And inviting you to do the same.

Thank you for being here.

Thank you for walking this path with me.

With so much love,
Cynthia