FINAL Ep12 S2: Think You Need More Confidence To Be An Entrepreneur? Think Again...
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Hey, welcome back to another episode of the Spiritually Embodied Leader Podcast. So excited. this particular conversation that I had with a friend came up in my mind yesterday, and I was like, Ooh, that needs to be talked about I had this conversation. Gosh, like several months ago at a cafe and my friend was you know letting me know of the different things that she was doing in order to step into the role of being a spiritual coach and as she was talking and we were going back and forth, like I saw so much of myself, my past self at the beginning of my entrepreneurial journey, in her at that moment. And I was just so glad that I was able to share what has helped me and shine some light on different things that has really made a difference and there's a particular topic that I really want to bring in to this episode and because I feel like someone really needs to hear it. And honestly, like, I'm applying this as I go literally in my business right now, showing up on the podcast, like taking the action to be able to do what's been on my heart and make bold moves behind the scenes, and to be able to show up and share how you can support yourself with this as well. So, yeah, my friend and I were talking at a cafe, and she was telling me about how, you know, she's starting to show up on social media and like she was mentioning how she wants to pivot more into spirituality and be a coach for people guiding them along their spiritual journey and so we were talking about that and there were few things that she had said and the biggest one that I really want to highlight right now is that she was mentioning how as much as she tries to go on social media and like take the action she feels like her confidence was really holding her back. Like it just deflated her momentum and felt like such an obstacle that it was like, oh, well, maybe I should just wait until you know I have more confidence and I can show up in a way that, you know people I can build trust with people, you know what I mean? And she can feel more like herself and yada yada, yada, and at that moment, I was like, you know what? It makes total sense. Right? Like it makes sense that you would want the confidence to be able to show up and serve people at your best, because that would really benefit like everyone involved. Right? And what it is that you're offering them and the journey that you wish to guide them through, and I know how amazing and potent that confidence can be because it really like solidifies the connection the excitement's there it really builds that trust between you and that client or potential customer, and that's a beautiful thing, Right? But the thing is, if you are pumping your brakes, because you don't feel like you have the confidence to be able to work with people and you are then holding yourself back from making the moves that you know, you need to make and that your business needs you to make, and that your potential clients need you to make too, if you're pumping your brakes first, because you're waiting for more confidence in order to show up in your business, I'm telling you right now, that's going to leave you stuck for so long. So long, it really is holding you back and it's the only thing holding you back. Okay? I mean, think about it all successful digital entrepreneurs did not wait around until that perfect time in that perfect moment when they had just enough confidence because they knew that the confidence would not come until they took the action. Yeah.
So it's actually reversed here okay? Because if you think about it whatever it is that you're confident in like the first thing that comes to my mind right now is parallel parking. Okay. I'm really great at parallel parking, it's like sometimes like a little cocky about it and if somebody is in my car, like in my passenger seat and I get the chance to parallel park, I'm like, oh yeah, check this out. Right.
And it's like I had practiced parallel parking for so long and I got so comfortable because I was competent in it. Then I became confident, The confidence of parallel parking did not happen until I started to parallel park. Yeah? At first, like before I even knew about cars, I didn't even know parallel parking was a thing.
And then I learned about cars when I was really young and then I watched my parents do the thing, you know, and then I learned about it. Right. I became more aware, more knowledgeable, and then I started doing it and yeah, it took some time in order for me to be able to do it swiftly. But eventually the more that I did it, the easier it got, yeah?
And now I have this natural confidence about it so, the confidence that you're waiting on only comes from practicing the thing enough times that you build the skill of it. You improve the skill so that it becomes more natural. And then it's like, Oh first, you like. Do it in the way you think you're supposed to do it, but the more they become comfortable and you're like able to like do it with your eyes closed or whatever. Then it's like, oh, you start to add a little bit of flare.
You start to put your style in there. Right? It's like you make it your own then more of you is embedded within the action of it. So in order for you to build the competence to begin practicing in the first place you have to just start. You won't get to confidence by waiting you will get there by starting.
And one thing I really want to drive home for you is that it's not the lack of confidence that's holding you back, it's actually the lack of courage. Okay, because if it all is that it takes is to just start. Then really you got to lean in on your courage. Yeah? You gotta be brave to start. You don't even need to think about confidence, that's not even like part of the menu here you got to just start, you have to make an intentional decision that you're going to be courageous and just go for it. Okay. So in order to get to the confidence you got to lead with courage in order for the confidence to follow. When you stop placing so much importance on the confidence or lack thereof, you can simply focus on what truly matters. And that is the aligned actions that your business and your clients need for you to take, Right? Because your business, your dreams, requires something of you. You've been a certain way up until this point, you've had a certain embodiment, a certain way of being, and it got you here. And that's beautiful. Congratulations. Yet this same way of being, especially if you do not have the results that you're looking for, that is not what's going to get you there. As my amazing mentor James Wedmore has told me what got you here will not get you there. So if you've been practicing the same thing over and over and over again, showing up in the same ways. Being who you have been in the past and expect a different result and wonder why things aren't changing. Then, you know why you got to do things differently, take bold action, and lead with courage. Okay?
And I'm going to be straight up, I'm not even going to sugarcoat it for you. Yeah. It's going to be fucking cringy. I know that's like what you're trying to avoid. I get it. I totally get it, but you got to go through the cringe. Okay? You got to be brave and you got to walk through the cringe because it'll happen in the beginning. And there's probably layers of shame and fear that really need to come up and be peeled away. Yeah, processed and healed. Okay, in order for you to get through it and to be able to even touch the realm of confidence. All right.
And it's a beautiful thing because honestly, if you haven't figured it out by now, entrepreneurship is a path of personal growth and spiritual growth on fucking steroids. Okay? All your shit is going to come up, if it hasn't already, or maybe it has and you're just like, ah, I don't know what to do with it, that's why I'm here okay? To help you learn how to regulate your nervous system, take the bold actions regulate your nervous system again, and continue to evolve and evolve and expand and grow beyond your comfort zone. Because all of the shame and the fear and the doubts and the what if you know this and this happens and the fear of judgment and all this stuff like it has to be tended to anyway. You can't like ignore it and stuff it down and pretend it's not there. No, you got to unpack it. So just know that your dream is requiring a new version of you to emerge, and I'm just really looking forward to sharing more of the tools and techniques and practices and different things that have helped me all along the way to be able to show up as I am with you right now and how I plan on continuing to evolve in the future.
So just know that your dream business, that epic fucking lifestyle that you are just yearning for is requiring a new version of you to emerge and confidence is not required for that. Courage is Okay?
Now at this point, I know it's so easier said than done, right? And so I just want to bring up these questions for you to really look at let's say, just pick one thing right now in your business that you're like, oh, I've been hesitant and this and that and like, I have been avoiding it, but I know it's time to do it or whatever, maybe you want to launch your own podcast, maybe you're ready to like take on one-on-one clients and you want to put out your first offer or maybe you're like on the verge of showing up on the social media for the very first time. How can you take in bite sizes of that task? Yeah. Can you break it down into smaller steps that feels doable for you?
Like, let's say if you want to start a podcast and it's so nerve wracking to like hit record and like know that other people are going to watch it and all this stuff. Right? Can you just record a podcast, but don't have the intention to post it yet, just like you know set yourself up. Get an idea of some kind of outline, just a few bullet points or whatever. Hit record, start talking, you know, introduce yourself, welcome to the blah, blah, blah podcast, and like, just go through the emotion of it, and then finish the recording and let it sit, like let it chill, yeah? And see how that shows up for you, are there microsteps a part of that project, a part of that task that you can start doing? And maybe at first it's like okay but I'm not going to do it all the way, I'm not going to like publish it yet, but then like you get the graphic ready or you get this in that right? And then it's like, okay. What's the next doable thing? What if I just tell my friend and like, she listens to it Right? Maybe you can send her like a Google drive thing or something, Right? Like what are some small, doable bite-sized steps that you can do and take action on that's not going to like freak your whole system out. You know what I mean? Okay. So another question I've got for you is what can you turn to, to help regulate yourself? Yeah, moments of self care, maybe you have a best friend that you're just like, oh my God. Like. I really want to talk this through with you and just can you be a soundboard for me? Can you hold space for me? Like I'm going to do this thing and like, I just need someone to talk to, Right? Someone to express, I definitely have got a best friend in my life who we have sent literally hours upon hours upon hours of voice notes, back and forth of just various things in life, but especially like the big things that we're being brave and taking action on and it's been so freaking helpful. Yeah? Like, do you need to get childcare for yourself in order to like actually go through all of the steps that are needed or do you really need to go out for a night and just have fun at an ecstatic dance session or something, you know what I mean? Just to like get the fucking wiggles out or I go outside and ground your feet on some grass.
Yeah. Or go hiking up a mountain, that's a big one for me. I love hiking up mountains. Shout out to my Capricorns.
So yeah, what can you turn to, to help regulate yourself so that, because check it out there's ways to process emotions and regulate yourself before you do the thing, but you're going to be like sandwiching it all the fucking time. Okay? Support yourself before it do the thing, support yourself after, before you do the next thing and then support yourself again until the next thing, you know what I mean?
If you need to take a day off and you need to step back, like that's okay too.
Get in touch with your body and listen to what it means so that it can guide you to what's most resourceful in that moment. Okay? Now, another question that I have for you is how can you set yourself up for success with micro habits?
So this brings up my double sometimes triple alarms, that I have in the morning like there was a time where I was letting myself sleep in and sleep in and sleep in, but then I was like, you know what? Like the morning time is really the perfect time for me to take care of myself, but I had to get up earlier and I would just was not my sleep cycle wasn't really supportive of that and so I set up alarms before I actually wanted to get out of bed because like, okay. I love listening to hypnosis tracks first thing in the morning, and for some reason like when I wake up, like I'm just not ready to just get out of bed right away. I literally need to lay there for like 30 minutes and sometimes I'll have anxious thoughts or I'm like, Ah, like really uncomfortable, right when I wake up and so hypnosis has been an amazing regulator for me and just to get myself in a calm state and to also when I wake up much earlier, even though I know I'm not going to get out of bed yet. When I have that super early alarm, that's my cue to be like, okay, I'm just going to pop in my headphones and turn on that hypnosis track and let it just like wake me up slowly, yeah?
And then when I wake up solely, I'm like, oh yeah, like I probed up, I reprogrammed my subconscious mind, I'm feeling so much better, I'm a lot more calm and then it's easier for me to get out of bed to do what I got to do. Yeah. So, is there anything that you can do to ask for support or set something up for yourself that's going to like give you the cues ahead of time to be able to do the thing. Okay. So, a different question just came up that wasn't in my notes but like how can you just make it fucking simple? And this, came up for me okay I'm going to bust out my so if you're not watching the video podcast on YouTube. I am busting out my fucking blue Yeti professional microphone that I have for my podcast that I used in the past for season one and like, I have it here it's all set up. Right? I've got my boom arm and the whole thing I'm like showing it in the video but for some reason, when I yesterday to record the first episode of the second season, I plugged in the microphone and it just wouldn't work. It wouldn't turn on, the light would turn on, but when I would speak into it, it wasn't picking up my voice, and then I would try to play it back and like and so I spent probably an hour because I went to best buy. I got a fucking new power cord for it thinking it might've been the cord because I thought, Hey, you know, I moved, maybe something happened during the move or whatever I don't know dude, I could not figure it out.
And I also try to look up YouTube videos to try to like, get it going because I love my fuckin, you know, professional mic, but I just couldn't figure it out. So, I was like what am I as literally going to let that hold me back from what I really want to do? You know, my soul's calling to be able to make my dreams a fucking reality.
And so I was thinking back I'm like you know what, my ear pod fucking headphone jack apple headset works perfectly fine. And that's what I use to voice note, my best friend back and forth, and the mic sounds great and I've even recorded some social media posts, Right? Just reels and shit with the microphone and I'm like, dude, that sounds that's perfectly fine, and so that's what I'm using right now. And sorry about that the last episode because my hair was in the front and like rubbing up against the mic and so there was that like, sound sorry about that but now I'm like, okay, hold the hair back you know, I rewatched it just to see how it was I took note of that and I just, I plugged it in and went with it and that's what I'm doing. I'm still going to try to figure out what's up with this mic because, you know, it's a good ass mic I, it's not that old, so yeah. I'll figure that out. But I made it simple.
I was like, you know what? I've got what I need. Bare basic shit. It's it's fine. That's when like, what is it? The basic Bish?
That's when being a basic bitch is really coming in clutch. You know what I mean? So like, keep it simple, keep it simple. What's doable? How can you do the best with what you've got, yeah? And just go for it. Okay?
And I'm going to tell you right now, when you start taking even the smallest of aligned actions and you lean in on your courage and you start to take the brave steps. Notice, if the universe starts showing particular things to you that is supportive, that is encouraging, that is what you really needed to hear right now because that has been happening for me in terms of launching the second season of this podcast and I've been coming up with a lot of barriers and things that I've had to overcome and obstacles and tech issues and all this shit and every time I'm like just, just, you know, it's okay there's always another way. I keep getting little drops of magic and medicine and just like inspiration that everything's going to work out and to just keep going. Okay? Yesterday, right after I recorded my very first episode of season two and I was feeling all my feels right it was like high and low, and I was celebrating at all. I got this very special letter in the mail. Okay, and it was actually a letter that I wrote to myself six months ago at an event called BBD live Business By Design. It's part of a business online program that's fucking amazing. If you ever have any questions about it, let me know I love to answer any of your questions. Cause it's, it's fucking epic and it was the very first online business course that I bought in 2019. and God, I love it so much, but when you buy BBD you get a free ticket to the live three-day event. Okay, and I went last year for the first time so since 2019, I hadn't gone in the four years that I had it and I had a fucking epic time. It was amazing and at the very end on the last day I wrote myself a letter and they prompted everyone to do this. So, wrote myself a letter we all gave it to the company and they're like we're going to mail it to you when we feel like you need it the most and yesterday that later came in the mail and I saw it and I fucking cried I did I'm about to cry right now.
And I literally had to sit down and I was just like, oh my God, this is exactly what I needed to read today.
And I just, I looked at the paper and I held onto it I closed my eyes and I felt the energy in the state that I was in, that was so elated like a way of being that I had never experienced before and it was exactly what I needed, because also there was triggers and things that were really pissing me off here at home and different things that like, I'm like, oh my God, like don't let this distract you, Cynthia.
And so the more that I kept going and going and going like little signs and things started coming in and I'm just so freaking grateful and I have a feeling that once you start going and you take that one step at a time you'll see that it's going to be all worth it and everything's going to be okay and the universe is on your side.
And something tells me that this may be your sign. So if you needed one. Here you go.
And if you need someone to talk to about this, or you want someone to like witness you in your courage and celebrate with you, reach out to me on Instagram, yeah? DM me. Okay? I would love to be there for you all right. Okay. I hope this was super helpful and let me know what you thought and I'll see you in the next episode. All right. Chat soon.
