Ep 7 | How Coaching Can Help You As A Conscious Mom (DONE)
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Cynthia: [00:00:00] Hello. Hello. Welcome to the Spiritually Embodied Leader Podcast. Yeah, it [00:01:00] feels so good to be back in this seat, in front of the mic here, connecting with you. Um, I had a little bit of a break and I'm just, I'm just so glad you know, and like you reset your batteries and like you fill your cup again and it's like, all right, now this feels real good, like, I'm just so happy to, to be here.
Um, so yeah, I just felt really called to share more on the topic of how coaching can help conscious moms, because I'm coming to find out that the more that I connect with conscious moms and I talk to them, I'm like, you know, what kind of support do you need? Or like, have you ever had a coach before?
And a lot of the times they don't even know about coaching. And they don't really know what it entails and what a coach does, you know? And it's just like, huh. And I realized that when coaching came into my life for the very first time when somebody introduced themselves as a life coach to me and worked with me and that, that was a whole different [00:02:00] experience and it was actually a really powerful, super magical experience that I'd love to share some time on the podcast. Let me know if you want to hear it. Um, and it has a lot to do with how it changed the trajectory of my life in terms of like relationships.
And it actually has to do, like Cody came into the picture for the very first time and Wow, it's just this whole magical story. So anyway, that was when coaching was first introduced to me, but when I started actively seeking coaching, it was mostly because, um, I decided to be an entrepreneur and I wanted to start my own business and all of this.
And so when I started going into, um, the entrepreneurial journey, I was then, you know, coaches came into my life and I was introduced to what it was like to have a mentor and all of this. And so I was like, huh, like super cool. And then once I started going deep into coaching and being coached, I realized that a lot of the [00:03:00] principles and a lot of the, the mindset and various things about coaching really started to trickle into the rest of my life and it started impacting me as a parent, it started rippling into me as a lover, you know, basically being a wife, I'm not legally married, but we're very much like, you know, bound by love. So yeah, it just really started to improve and enhance and helped me really lead my own life and it inspired me to become a coach myself. And so, yeah, I just realized how much of an impact it had on my motherhood, and so now it's inspired me to start to help other conscious moms.
So recently, I got some feedback from a client that I was working with for like four sessions, you know, they're about an hour long, no more than an hour and a half, you know, average was like 75 minutes, um, but we had like this little journey together for four [00:04:00] sessions and I asked her a series of questions at the end and the feedback that I got from her and just like getting to know her experience, I was like, wow, okay, this is really important to talk about coz when I started working with her and she was just like, what, what do you do? Like, she didn't really understand what coaching entailed, and so I was like, okay, this is so helpful to, um, really hear how it helped her and how coaching can actually continue to take her even further. Right? So I just felt called sharing with you what she had shared in her experience. so that you can have a better understanding of how it may be able to help you as well, or how it can apply to you or ideas of like, oh, well they came for this topic, but I would actually want to come for this topic.
And so if you have any questions about, you know, um, coaching and specifically how I can help you cuz I've recently created a framework and so I'm, I'm just really excited to share more about it cuz it's, it's helped me so [00:05:00] much and it's so cool to start to see how it's starting to help my clients as well.
So, you know, I had asked her like, so how was life like before the coaching? Right? What was your motherhood like? And she had mentioned that, you know, her day-to-day was very busy and super exhausting, and it felt like there was little to no time left for herself. And that's such a common thing for us moms.
And it's like this, it's kind of a weird default that happens. And of course, you know, I'm not surprised because I feel like society is kind of built up this way. Um, and it's a very, it can be an unconscious thing, which we can, you know, change that, although I've noticed it's pretty common for moms not to have any hobbies or not to do things for themselves, right?
Or carve out time and space for themselves because they can just get so busy with life, with day-to-day responsibilities, with the chores, with the errands and everything else, right? Because of course, we want the best for our children, and of [00:06:00] course we want to be there for our spouses as well, if we have someone significant in our lives that we're like raising a family with and living together and all of that, right?
And so it's just so easy to get caught up in the day-to-day responsibilities and not even take the time to be like, what do I need? And even if we do take that time to check in and be like, you know what? Usually it's like, I don't wanna do a damn thing, right? Like, usually it's like, I just wanna sit and do nothing, which is great, I love doing that. or there's the other side of like, I wish I can do nothing. I wish I can slow down. But there may be people that like want to slow down and they can't seem to slow down. Like their body and their minds are always on the go, go, go, go, go. And they have to do something. And maybe there's even some anxiety, to slowing down doing nothing, which is, you know, that's something on the nervous system that we [00:07:00] can work on.
Um, But when there is that time to be able to slow down and re acclimate ourselves. Usually what would be great is if we slow down, we do nothing, but we also still have enough time and space to be able to give back to ourselves. So we have that moment of emptiness, of nothingness, and then it's like, oh, like what do I actually wanna do?
What are the things that light you up? It may be singing, it may be spending time in nature. Maybe it's like, you know what, I just wanna go out for a cup of tea with a friend, you know, um, in the afternoon or something. And so it like having that extra resources within ourselves to give ourselves what we need is so critical yet, it really, it was so helpful for my client to have me come in and be like, okay, like, what do you need? What do you want? And one thing that she really loved, that like she's been wanting to do for [00:08:00] a while now is do moon magic, like she wants to prepare herself for the phases of the moon that are coming up and do rituals and buy the candles and get the herbs and the, you know, whatever it was that she felt called to do.
But she needed that time and space to be able to, you know, whip out her notebook and do some research and plan it all out, right? Maybe go shopping or whatever. Like she needed that and that's like part of her spiritual practice and that was really important for her. Yet she felt like, for her in particular, it was very chaotic.
It was just like, oh my God. Like I don't even know where to begin. And it's just, it just seemed like too much. Right? But when I was able to come in and be like, Hey, this is really important to you, like, is this really important to you? Yes. Okay, then let's do something about this. Let's see how we can easily, and with little effort, step by step, baby step to see like what is the next best step for you to help be able to support yourself, right?
and so that was, that was super helpful [00:09:00] for her. And that brings me to another point where I was asking her like, what was your experience like working with me and like having a coach, you know?
And she was saying that what she really enjoyed was feeling seen and validated. Like to have that time and space for someone to just be there with their undivided attention, to hear them out, right? To like talk out the problems, unpack the situation, have tools and practices to be able to maybe undo some conditioning or whatever, or limiting beliefs, or even things that like we want to evoke more of, right? Like I knew, um, confidence was a really big one for her. And so we did something called anchoring where we were able to evoke different kinds cuz it wasn't just confidence, I'm like, what else? Cuz I think she was having trouble with like tapping into confidence because she was lacking it for so much for so long that I was like, well what's something else that, um, kind of is similar to [00:10:00] confidence that you feel like would've fuel it and make it even more powerful, right? And I knew like, empowerment and to feel knowledgeable and like different things was really helpful for her. So we kind of, um, worked on that to infuse this confidence that she's seeking to actually start to evoke it in the present moment. And so, you know, there was a lot of different things that we worked on together, but the overall, like her actually being able to talk about where she's at, who she is, her wants and desires, her struggles, and all of this was really, really valuable to her. And um, she even was mentioning how there were some trauma hurdles that she didn't really even know were there and didn't realize how much of an issue was causing in her marriage.
And there was actually something that she had said. I'm gonna still ask her if I can pull out the audio on it cuz it's super powerful that she thought, she had done this other journey and she was healing through something, but she [00:11:00] assumed that the healing was going to help this particular trauma that she was aware of and didn't really know how to go about it but she just assumed that like healing this one area of her life was going to then heal this other area of her life. She thought they were connected, but she went through this whole year long process. And while that was very needed and important for her to do in her life, it actually didn't take care of the other thing that she thought it would.
And when we started working through a different, I think it was one technique that we did, um, we started to focus in on that particular thing that she wanted help with. And it started to resolve itself within like 10 minutes. And she was just really surprised. She was like, wow, I thought this whole year long, um, experience was gonna take care of it, but it didn't.
And so she felt kind of, you know, stuck with it. And, yeah, but that didn't have to be her reality. You know what I mean? So, [00:12:00] thank goodness that she actually brought it to the table. Cuz these, you know, with coaching, we, even though like we may come for a specific thing, right? There's a specific intention or like, I want help with this.
There could be various things that are tied into it. And so, you know, I'm, I'm realizing like, I think I'm much more of like a life coach for conscious moms. Um, although what I, the distinction that I do wanna make is that I really focus in on the person. I really focus in on you and the things that you can control, because I've noticed that when I connect and talk with conscious moms, usually it's either like they want help with their kid, right?
It's like, okay, like how do I change their behavior? How do I have them do this instead of this, you know, or whatever. Or they're like, oh, my partner, like I'm having these issues in my relationship and blah, blah, blah. And it's like it can be so easy, right? To try to point the [00:13:00] finger at various people or situation or events in our life.
But when it comes to coaching and working with me, we really do point the finger back to ourselves. And this isn't in a way to shame or guilt ourselves. It's just bringing our focus in and really coming back to ourself and being like, okay, how can I help myself? How can I create change from the inside out?
Because that's all we really have control over, right? And that's where we can create change in our outer reality, is to begin with ourself. Yeah. And I can tell you so many stories of situations resolving themselves when I actually did that, when I took care of myself, when I started attending to who I was being and showing up in different ways and connecting to my family members or my friends, whatever, in different ways than I was before.
And it really, you know, it really made a [00:14:00] difference. So, yes, another thing that, um, my client was mentioning was that she really enjoyed having some kind of like action plan, some kind of goal to be able to focus in on, to actually like, make it a part of her reality. Cuz like, remember how I mentioned how she really wanted to do moon magic, right? And you know, it, there's just, I don't wanna say a lot involved, but especially at moms, we really gotta get all the ducks in a row to actually make things happen. I remember when I wanted to go to a healing retreat and I was just like, okay, three days. Hmm, I gotta get multiple I, well, for one weekend I had like, Three, maybe even four.
I think there was like three babysitters, whether it was like the grandparents or one babysitter and all of this, like for me to be able to go out of town, it wasn't even that far. It was like an hour out out of town for me to go an hour out of town to spend four days, three nights [00:15:00] somewhere, I had to have multiple babysitters and like all of these things in place to be able to do that, right?
And so anyway, I was like, all right, honey, like, let's figure this out. Like if you really wanna do this and it really lights you up, like what do you need to do first? Like, how much time do you need? Okay. What day of the week would best for you to practice this?
And so when we figured out, okay, like this place, this time, then I was like, okay, now, who do you need to talk to? What do you need to do in order for this to happen? Like, what's the next domino? Right? And so she was like, oh, I need to talk to my partner. And then there was some things that were coming up for her and that, you know, she was concerned about like, oh, what if, you know, because usually he is at work. And so by the end of the day, they have that evening to connect and lay in bed together and catch up and this and that. But she's like, you know, and there are some times where he is like, oh, like you're not gonna lay in bed with me, and blah, blah, blah. So then, you know, she started feeling bad, but I was like, well, if you're doing that, like, [00:16:00] on average five, six days out of the week. Like, can you, is it okay for you to reserve one day out of the week at least to yourself? And she's like, yeah, totally. I'm like, okay. I'm like, well, we won't know what happens until, you know, we try it out and see what he says and blah, blah, blah. So she went to talk to him and it actually turned out really well and he was really supportive of her and she just felt like, oh wow, like I can actually do this.
And that's so important, you know? That's just one example of how coaching was helpful to her to kind of just organize the chaos in her head, you know, and reign her energy and be like, okay, what's step number one? What's step number two, and not only have that plan, you know, breadcrumb by bed come to make things happen, but for someone to actually talk it out, to unpack and organize and assess things out, and ask her questions to see what is best for her.
Right, because like my lifestyle and the way that I do [00:17:00] things may not be best for you, and that's okay. But we can come together and figure out what is best for you and how to best go about it. Because honestly, what is best for you really is also best for your family and your loved ones. Okay? And being able to get personalized care from someone is another really amazing benefit of having a coach privately. Yeah. Having that one-on-one coaching container, because you may need certain tools and practices that another mother doesn't need. right And vice versa. And I have a different client right now where I use very specific tools that I craft for her and what she needs support in that the client that I'm talking about in this episode didn't need at all and vice versa.
And so, yeah. It's like there, there's so many different ways that we can start to tend to, the kind of support that you need because I love working with the body, right? I can bring embodiment practices into it, but also the subconscious mind is [00:18:00] very important to decondition and reprogram.
So there are various techniques that we can work on with that as well as the spiritual aspect of it too. Um, and so I always hold this container, it's. like A a sacred container for the entire journey where we open a sacred circle at the very beginning before we do any coaching. And we set intentions, we give offerings to your spirit family, as I like to say, which can consist of your highest Self your ancestors, and your mother's lineage, and father's lineage, as well as spirit guides, Angels sacred guardians like and anyone else that you want to bring in specifically, you know what I mean? Like, you may be working with a particular spirit or there may be a certain, uh, ancestors in your ancestor, in your family that has passed away and you're just like, dude, I just want them close to me in my life right now.
And so we can call them in, we can connect and give offerings and all of this because my goodness. The amount of miracles that have happened in my life when [00:19:00] I connected to my spirit family has just, it's changed my entire life, honestly. So, yeah, that's why it's a really important factor to open the sacred circle, to kind of have that part of the container go through the entire coaching experience and then close that container to give thanks to reflect and evaluate and all of these things. Right?
I am just so grateful to have worked with her because the way that she was expressing how grateful she was to not feel judged, right? Like to be able to be authentic, be transparent, to open up and share like her desires, share her struggles and all of this, and actually have someone to unpack and untangle or reestablish certain things so that she can feel more empowered so that she can feel like she's actually getting taken care of. Like, that's so huge. You know, it's one thing to like [00:20:00] have friends to be able to get things off your chest or vent or just like share what's going on in your life that's so important, right? Like I want everyone to be able to have people and friendships like that in their life that they feel comfortable enough to do that. But it's one thing to be able to just, you know, talk about what's going on in their lives.
And just being like, oh, well, you know, I hope for the best, right? I hope, I hope it all works out for you. Um, or you know, how can I help? But it's like they're not really trained in certain things that can actually reprogram the subconscious mind or tap into their body, which I believe is an extension to the subconscious mind, right?
Like to me, the body is the subconscious but anyway, when you have someone that can actually like, start to change and shift and create transformational, results in your life, like, damn, that's when you're really doing the work. You know what I mean? Like, it's one thing to just like bitch and complain or, you [00:21:00] know, just like share some wins that happen to your life and then like, oh, cool.
Good for you. And then its like Okay, but now what? Right? Like, how are we moving forward? How are we growing and evolving? Yeah. How are we tending to, the pains and pressures of our day-to-day lives and also open up to something greater? And that's something that coaching has helped me that I am so grateful for.
I'm like, wow. I actually have someone in my corner to be like, all right, honey, let's get to work, let's fucking create some magic together. Yeah. And you're gonna be responsible for your results. Now, of course, it's important for me as a coach to have the skills and the capabilities to do that, to facilitate that.
Right? I have responsibility on my end to be able to do that for you. And like I, we're playing this game together out on a court, right? And I have the ball at times, and I come up to the center of the court and I'm like, all right, I've got this play this game plan to play with [00:22:00] you. Are you gonna meet me here in the middle?
Right? So then you have your responsibilities to get up and meet me there, and then we'll play back and forth. There are gonna be times where the balls during your court, you gotta step up and do your part of the work. And then the ball gets handed back to me and I'm like, all right, let's try this new thing.
And so we go back and forth like that, right? Now another thing that's really important is that I also only have my own scope of practice, right? I've got my limitations. I am not a therapist. And even though I am trauma informed and I know how to work with, I'll say lower grade trauma, there is a point where it's like, okay, I can only do so much and I know where that threshold is and I know when to refer out, right? Because I myself have been at a point where I needed to get a specialized trauma coach to work through my complex PTSD that other people did not have the skill and ability to handle.
Right. And to actually [00:23:00] take me through a journey of post-traumatic growth. So there's also that, you know what I mean? And I think that's really great to actually build, widen the capacity of our resources to have these different people that can play these various roles and actually actually have the tools and the skills to be able to tend to ourselves in these different ways, but how will you ever know what kind of support and specialized care you need until you actually open yourself up to receive support, right? To hire a coach, to look into various therapists or whatever it is that you need. Like, you know, I've realized I actually had gone through for this particular area of my life that led me to the trauma coach that I worked with for Complex P T S D.
Like, I went through different things. I went to a hypnotherapist even, I went to different modalities to help me, and I finally got to the care that was like, oh no honey, you actually need this. [00:24:00] Um, and I'm so grateful to have allowed myself to open up to the possibility of getting the help that I really need.
Yeah, getting real with like, you know what? I'm getting tired of living this way and so I'm gonna do something about it. And that's the thing, like we all have the power to actually do something about it. Right? So if you're in a place right now where you are ready to put yourself back into the center of your own life and have an experience of equipping yourself with tools and practices and resources to help regulate your nervous system, um, to process challenges, things like that, or help release old patterns and disempowering, you know, programming that no longer serves you, then definitely reach out to me.
Yeah, because I really wanna help tap you back into your own passions and purpose and help you prioritize the [00:25:00] things that actually light you up. Yeah. So that you can feel more at peace, to feel relief, uplifted, grateful, calm, present, and ultimately connected back to who you truly are and connected back to your family, back to the universe. You know what I mean? Um, something greater than yourself as well. So if you're ready to go on a journey of reestablishing trust and power within yourself so that you can, you know, embody the mom or the higher version of yourself that you know you can be, then definitely connect with me. Okay. I have this brand new one-on-one coaching program that I'm so excited to share with you.
Um, and it's a three month journey. Yeah. And I've created this three part signature framework called Attune, transmute, and Align. And so we can definitely talk more about that. Now the best way to get started is to book a free connection call with me. Okay. So that [00:26:00] we can take the time to get clear on what it is that you need. Yeah. Like where you're at in life, what it is that you need, and how I can best support you.
And of course the link to that is in the show notes. Or if you're on my Instagram, it'll be the link in my bio and I'm sure it's on my website too. Okay. All right, so I hope this was super helpful, and if you have any more follow up questions or anything that you wanna talk about, please DM me on Instagram. I would love to chat. Okay. All right, well, I will catch you on the next episode, and I hope you have a beautiful day. Chow. [00:27:00]
